A good sock fetish is worth having. It gives you an excuse to throw out all those dull old ones and invest in something new and modern. My socks have always been plain black as I wear a lot of black pants and shoes. These days I am hard pressed to find a pair of my socks in the clean washing. For some strange reason they are drawn to the feet of my boys where they have taken up residence. The only socks of mine that I can find are the ones who are well past their use by date – full of holes and lacking in support.
Considering that socks were amongst the first items of clothing ever worn they are sadly overlooked in the fashion department. Early man wore bits of animal skin tied around their ankles for warmth and protection. By the tenth century AD socks were a sign of the rich and noble. I don’t want to be noble (rich would be good) but I do want a pair of socks that will stay faithful to my feet and keep me warm. If they were good looking I would be even happier.
Now that winter is here I can evict the partnerless socks from my sock drawer. I can too the holey socks and I can try to mate up the survivors. As socks don’t actually create offspring I am now justified in going on my annual sock shop.
At this point I would like to give you a tip. When you find a sock you like, buy it in bulk. You will always be able to find a matching pair as you burrow through the pile of clean washing each morning, and think how much time and stress that will save you.
This year I think I will go for non-boring socks. In fact, if I keep away from black the boys might leave my socks alone. My socks will scream to the world that I am the mother of sock thieves. What do you think? Bright patterns? Bright colours? Odd sizes? 4 dozen pairs of loud socks?
Perhaps I could go for the over the knee look and keep my whole lower legs snug and warm. These would certainly be safe from thieving fingers. Wouldn’t they look wonderful with my fluffy pink slippers?
You know, I think we could add some sock accessories. Why not give my socks some style? Let’s invest in some sock garters! Look what I have found. Cherries to add a bit of warmth to winter, spikes for those times when you just want to be left alone and ‘hello nurse’ for those times when you don’t!
Finally, for the ultimate indulgence I want spa socks. These will be for no one but me. Just pop those in the microwave for a few seconds then slip your feet into them. You can buy them scented with essential oils, or with gel soles to moisturise your tootsies as you relax.
Ahh, who said anything about winter?
Boys, help yourselves to my socks. I don’t think you will find anything to suit you now!
(Sock accessories from http://www.sockdreams.com/ ) Article by Anne Maybus and first published in You Magazine by Real Mums